Generally this week has been calm. We went to get Ember’s ultrasound on her hips and everything was normal. She did well during the procedure, which was good for me and her.

Earlier this week I theorized that one of the things I’d heard prior to this, that the 8 week mark was when mom’s hormones we’re mostly back to normal, explained away some of the awkward feelings I’d been having. Finding myself feeling useless and overwhelmed – with the house, this baby, impending return to work, etc – I wondered if maybe I hadn’t missed out entirely on post partem depression. I checked in with my doctor as well as a few friends to see if this 2 month mark was a well known timeline and was relieved to find that it’s entirely possible that 2 months of not really sleeping does have this affect on you.  I find that helpful and was able to reevaluate how I’m spending my time. To that end, I spent the entire day today holding this precious baby in my arms and doing very little that I would consider “useful.” And I might do it again tomorrow.

Shes perfect and amazing and wonderful. I can’t believe I’m going back to work in a month. But I also miss being in the office and not on the baby clock of constant feedings, diaper changes and brief fleeting windows of time when I have my hands free to do other things.

We took her out to the front porch earlier this week to see the sunset. It was beautiful even if she couldn’t see it.